A person's appetite is fed, temperament is brought out, ideas are produced by nagging, cruelty is produced by loneliness and helplessness, shamelessness is produced by indulging in every possible way.
Don't blame the child for this or that. Everything he has now is thanks to your early upbringing.
There is an old movie called "Qing Pine Ridge". At the beginning, it played two young people who wanted to learn the technique of driving a carriage. One day, they secretly drove the carriage of the production team out to practice. When they passed under an old tree with a crooked neck, the horse suddenly panicked. Running wild, almost killed. Later, everyone found that Ma went crazy every time he came here, and felt that there was something tricky, so they began to investigate. It turned out to be a handlebar style deliberately causing damage. I used to whip the horse when I walked here. Later, when the horse saw the tree, it became frightened and had to whip 3 whips to subdue it. Others don't know that this is his trick to tame the horses, thinking that only if he can steer these horses, he can control the carriage for a long time.
It turned out that the horse was not frightened for no reason, but for a reason, but the reason was not in front of us, but in the past. The same is true of people, the problem is often not in the present, but in the past. A person's problems in adulthood can basically be found in his early experiences.
An American criminal psychologist said that it is impossible for a person to suddenly change from an absolutely normal person to a completely evil person one day at the age of 35. The key to the formation of violent personality lies in childhood. A large number of cases show that most of the cruel, indifferent and vicious criminals had experiences of helplessness, lack of care and rough life in childhood.
In July 2003, the Shenyang police arrested the criminal suspect Wang according to the clues reported. The police are no strangers to this 28-year-old young man, because he has been sent to reeducation through labor twice. What shocked the police was that this thin man, who was less than 1.6 meters tall, committed more than 30 consecutive crimes and killed more than 40 people in the past 8 years.
This cold-blooded killer had a tragic childhood. He told the police: "In my memory, I have never felt the happiness of family and childhood. My dad was a gambler. As far back as I can remember, he gambled all day long, and he would come back to drink when he won. Big wine, if we lose, we will take out my mother and my brother. We will either fight or let us kneel, sometimes kneeling is half the night. The family is so poor that there is only a kang and a pot left, and it is difficult to even eat enough. When I was 8 years old, my mother couldn't take it anymore and divorced my father. My 6-year-old brother followed my mother and I followed my father, but my father didn't care about me at all and threw me to my grandparents , I'm playing with money again. My grandfather and my grandmother don't want to care, and they scold me and beat me at every turn."
He only went to primary school when he was 13 years old, and he dropped out of school after more than a year, wandering outside all day. He ran from Kaiyuan to Tieling and stayed there for about half a year. He has no livelihood skills, begging when he is hungry, and sleeping in the train station at night. One day, he saw that a carriage was pulling a straw bag, so he climbed up, fell asleep in a daze, and woke up in Shenyang. Later, he spent most of his time in Shenyang.
When he first arrived in Shenyang, he mainly worked as a beggar in the South Railway Station and Taiyuan Street. There are many children begging there, all of whom ran away from their homes for various reasons. They beg for food when they are young, steal when they are older, and rob when they are older. Because he was young and new, many people bullied him, and he was always blue and purple. Once, he was beaten to death and woke up to find himself covered in blood. He gritted his teeth and crawled back to the train station, swearing secretly that he had to make a world out of it. He told the police, "Maybe I later learned how to kill without blinking when I committed a crime."
In 1991, he was caught by the police while stealing a wallet, and he was sent to reeducation through labor for two years. After he came out, the 18-year-old was even more courageous. He felt that it was too slow to steal money from his wallet, so he might as well go robbery. So, he found a partner to commit the crime, hid the knife on his body, and looked for the target of the crime everywhere. In 1993, they carried out the first robbery in a hutong and seized 20,000 yuan from a man's suit. After tasting the sweetness, he was out of control.
Later, he intensified his efforts, raping and murdering at the same time as robbery. In 1996, his accomplice was arrested and confessed to him. Since the police only knew about him posing as a police officer to extort money, he only admitted this. After smuggling out, he was sent to labor camp for 3 years. This incident prompted him to make a determination to "make a big case and do it alone".
On December 4, 1998, he was released six months early. That night, he beat a young woman walking by the river with a stick and raped her. A few days later, he raped another woman in the same way. In the first year he came out of the labor camp, he committed more than 20 crimes alone, killing a dozen people and raping seven or eight people.
In a robbery in 1999, he only grabbed 200 yuan, but destroyed a family of three. The hostess died on the spot, and the man was seriously injured and sent to the hospital for emergency treatment. He died three years later. Their 8-year-old son was stabbed in the spinal nerve, resulting in a high paraplegia, and the situation is extremely tragic. When Wang was arrested and heard that the child was disabled for life, he was very disturbed. But instead of guilt, he regretted that he might as well just kill him.
Only once did he have a ray of kindness, but he quickly snuffed it out again. It was a pair of lovers in their twenties. He killed the man first, and the woman knelt down and begged him. He hesitated for a moment, chatted with her for more than 20 minutes, and then thought that he couldn't let her go, so he stabbed in from the back. "One kill, don't let her suffer", this is what he thinks of benevolence.
From Wang's growth experience, it can be seen that when a person has not experienced "loving upbringing" that is more important than money in childhood, he will not have even a trace of love in his heart. Wang's cruelty caused dozens of families to suffer. Therefore, the defects experienced by a person in his early years not only affect his own life, but also pay a heavy price for society.
So I often say, how can a person who has never been loved since childhood know how to love others? How can a person who has never felt happiness since childhood have a healthy and sunny mentality? How can a person who has never been respected since childhood respect the rights of others? How can a person who has never been treated kindly since childhood treat others kindly?
After being arrested, Wang told the police: "In recent years, I have also thought about it, I have been like this in my life, I have no culture, no skills, and I can't do anything except crime." People like him who make a living from crime , not only lost the sense of right and wrong, shame, and even the humanity gradually disappeared. They will do whatever they need to do.
Unlike sociopaths, such people are not born criminals, but are created by circumstances. In their early years, they tended to have relatively normal psychological manifestations. They only encountered misfortune in life or failed family upbringing. They lived in society when they were very young.
Some people are very pitiful. They don't know who their parents are from childhood, they are abandoned, or because their parents divorced, their families are poor, and they have many children, they become superfluous people. They are often separated from their families and schools since childhood, and live a life of begging, wandering, and petty theft, so they are discriminated against by society. In order to compete for living space and certain interests, they often fight with each other, from being beaten to learning to beat people, and gradually become ruthless. Due to their long-term separation from normal family life, they have become more and more ruthless and inhumane, resulting in indiscriminate killing of innocent people.
It can be seen that the influence of early experience on people is crucial, because it determines the future direction of people. People are all raised, so the way of raising them in the early years is very important. I have a conclusion: a person's appetite is fed, his temper is brought out, ideas are brought out by nagging, cruelty is created by loneliness and helplessness, and shamelessness is created by indulging in every possible way.
Once a person embarks on the road of crime in the early years, it is difficult to return to the normal track of life. Because different age groups have different life tasks, once a person misses the life lessons in the early years, it will be difficult to make up for it for life. When a man lives by crime, he is like a wolf, whoever encounters him is unlucky. Therefore, if we do not educate our children well from childhood and help those poor children, we will create "evil wolves" to harm ourselves and the whole society.
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